can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
What a dumb baby whore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
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