no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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