I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
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