my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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