note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
