birth control should be required to get into college
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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