i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
