You just made me feel so damn special
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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