maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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