I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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