I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
