i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize