U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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