so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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