Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
