You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
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