eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
