My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I have fence marks all over my body
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
