Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
