Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Randomize
