Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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