dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
And the cops told us we were all naked.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Randomize
