Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
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