So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
