and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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