so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
