I wanna passion pit in your ass
That's when you crack a 10am beer
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I have already put on my inside pants.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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