hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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