Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
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