whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
