For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
