Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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