I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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