She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
