Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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