I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Never underestimate the power of titties
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize
