You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
