I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize