You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
