you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
You pole danced in your parka.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize