so that wasnt chicken after all
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
