And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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