Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
