My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
