how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
