Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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