Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Randomize
