i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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