If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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