is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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