help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
50% drunk capacity currently
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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